The overwhelming feelings of Anger and Resentment – What to do About It!
The overwhelming feelings of Anger and Resentment What to do About It!
The overwhelming feelings of Anger and Resentment – What to do About It!
I am certain we all have at one stage in our lives experienced being hurt by someone else’s actions or words, resulting in a range of emotions such as anger, disappointment, rejection, resentment, and hurt.
With all these emotions, Resentment has the potential to be the most toxic of all of these emotions.
Unlike anger, which is a more acute, aggressive emotion that usually has a quick expiry date.
Resentment is like a game of Russian roulette, with the hope that the bullet will bypass you and get the other person.
The problem with resentment is that it is often rationally justified. Someone would have hurt us enough to cause us physical or emotional harm. As a result, they “deserve” our rage and resentment as a form of “payback” to balance the scales, as it were.
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned,” the Buddha wisely said.
So, if you believe it is time to let go of your rage and resentment, here are six simple steps you can take:
1. Identify and accept the core emotions that anger may be overlaid upon. Be present with these feelings and accept the openness they evoke.
2. Consciously observe your anger and resentment. Allow it to be what it is. Keep it. Consider adding some space around it. Take note of what happens.
3. Determine your role in the situation(s) for which you are angry or resentful. People usually contribute to the situations that irritate or resent them.
4. Experiment with different ways of expressing anger and resentment. Discuss your feelings with people you trust who are supportive and safe. Keep a journal about them. Work out, go for a walk, run, hike, or take part in a sport to get your feelings out. Participate in activities that promote social and economic justice, as well as nonviolent activism, if thats your thing.
5. Learn relaxation and self-calming techniques, such as intentional breathing, mindfulness, meditation, yoga, progressive relaxation, and quiet, unplugged time. And Finally.
6. Forgive! This is you taking recognition that we all make mistakes. To forgive is to acknowledge that doing otherwise is only hurting us. To forgive is understanding that “hurting people hurt people.” Empathy plays a big role here. Just like a wounded animal may lash out and bite you even when you are only trying to help, we’re rarely aware of all the invisible emotional wounds that others have been inflicted by.
As you navigate through the tumultuous seas of life, resist the siren call of others’ rage and bitterness. Refuse to be ensnared by negativity or gossip, for your path is illuminated by a different light—one of resilience and positivity.
The past, with all its joys and sorrows, is immutable. Yet, your response to it is within your control. Embrace the power of acceptance, for in accepting what has been, you liberate yourself from the chains of anger and resentment, channelling your energy into the boundless possibilities of the present.
You stand at the precipice of your own journey, poised to shed the burdens of emotional weight and embrace the boundless horizon of life. With courage in your heart and determination in your soul, seize this moment and forge ahead with unwavering resolve.
So, as you embark on the next chapter of your adventure, remember: You’ve got this! Release the burdens of the past, embrace the present, and chart a course toward the future you envision.
Until we meet again, may your path be illuminated by the radiance of your own strength and resilience. Onward, dear traveller, to the wonders that await!
Rhoda Chaalan
